First post! I am not a new blogger, but new on here. So here goes:
We are just 2 weeks into summer vacation and I find myself loking at the calendar. Anxious much? While I mean it as a joke I have to say, it is complicated juggling it all some days.
Background note here.. I am a full time student, mother of a 3 yr old daughter, Naomi and 5 yr old son, Danny. I had a miscarriage with our third addition almost a month ago. I am 27, and engaged to Sean, my fiance and he works nights while I go to schol durring the day. Danny has Autism Spectrum Disorder and Sensory Processing Disorder and we have found he does not do well at daycare. So, you do what you have to to make it work. We joke that we are single parents durring te week! It s a full time job, and one that often is very stressful. Hence the miscarriage. So, to help myself, I am taking yoga and meditation 3x a week. And am attempting to walk an hour on each of the other 4 days. Because of stress and emotional eating and not taking care of myself I have put on a hundred pounds in the past few years. Nothing to be proud of, but at some point we have to re-organize our ownselves as adults, just like I have to help my son do. So, my days start at 6am and are filled with school, my afternoons and evenings as a single mom, and my nights are long and loaded with homework because I am a Special Education major. I try to get to bed by 1am and suceed most nights!
Now back to summer. Well, Danny goes to occupational therapy once a week, which he highly enjoys. I have found a sensory storytime through the local library once a month for children with Sensory Integration Disorders. Fridays are nature hikes at the local parks because it seems to help calm him. I try and take the kids to the park at least 5x a week. We have the pool set up, a sandbox, trampoline, swing, ball pit, tunnel and I am working on a crash pad. I am slowly turning my garage into his therapy type playroom. This offers him many activities to help regulate his nervous system better. We have been given a computer program by his speech pathologist to use over the summer because Danny is unable to write because of his poor motor skills. But keeping him interested and focused proves to be a major challenge. The doctor has started him on a acid reflux medicine this past week. His therapist recommended it because everytime he has a meltdown he throws up. I am hoping to see an improvement in this area. Especially because it causes him so much discomfort. And of course the constant never ending fghting and sibling rivalry between him and his sister. It has gotten worse oer the years because I think she is beginning to see the difference in them and in how his behavior is dealt with. I am trying to find ways to re-instill in her the "why" that she often seeks. And the therapist has also suggested that Danny needs to begin counceling but not until he is further along in therapy because his disorder went undiagnosed for 5 years that it has caused some emotional distress. My goal is to give Danny as much as possable with as many options as possable.
So on days like today where he has been very too rough in his play and pushing and hitting, where he has spent most the day mocking and repeating what is said, where he has had a few screaming melt downs, where he and his sister have spent most the day fighting, where none of his food was the right color or temperature, where he has cried and screamed because of doorbells and construction trucks, and sirens, and the gardeners leaf blower, and where he has left the reminents of Hurriane Katrina relived through the house because he is having a very disorganized day, on days like this, yes, I admit I look at the calendar guestimating how long until bedtime, and until school starts again.
Right now as I type I hope for tomorrow to be a better day. One that he willing follows the hourly schedule and sticker chart. Because posative incentive often gives me an extra arm in this house I will offer up a trip to the park before lunch in return for a happy morning. I keep my fingers crossed for something semi close! We have a play date with a new neighbor down the street. He is a few years older tan Danny but the kids played with him this past weekend and as I talked with his mom, found that she works at the preschol I am enrolling my daughter in and that her son also has Sensory Integration Disorder and Emotional Distress Disorder. You would be amazed at how many "disorders" there are, but each is unique to the child and helps those around them to better understand their disability and ability's better. It is nice to talk with another mom that has experience in this area I do have to admit. Often we are let feeling alienated from the world around us.
For all that comes with the terratory I know this is my place. Not easy, but it takes a certain kind of person to walk in my shoes. I love my son and on the good days where he allows me to hug him I hug extra long. Everynight when he is asleep I sneak in and kiss him on the forhead. Because he is so sensative to touch he often rejects affection that most children embrace, so you have to patiently wait and hold onto it when the chance comes. Just like as a parent, we need to hold onto each and every day. They grow up fast and I can not think how soon it will before he starts hitting more and more milestones.
I close today with this quote: "You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back." ~William D. Tammeus
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